Refreshing

After a hot summer, the persistent rain has me looking around for Noah. Wherever he is, is precisely where I want to migrate. Strange how the rain, though often a synonym for a sad face, or mellow spirit at best, can also serve to deliver moments of refreshment. I've found myself not only enjoying it, but anxious for its return during the intermittent breaks. And I've noticed the same lift in others.

As a kid, the rain was the signal to make boats to float in the water running along the street, or wade through the ditches filled with rain (I know sounds unsanitary. It's amazing what we can live through when no one us how bad it is for us.). It was the time to break out a game of ultimate football, which resembled mud wrestling. And it was a time to lay the normal routine aside, stay home if you could, and let the world slow down. Some things you don't out grow. Anyone for a little football?

Reconnections

At noon Carolon and I sat down for lunch with a young woman who when last we saw her twenty years ago was a teenage young lady in our youth group. Twenty years with no contact and then I received an email inquiring if I was the former youth minister at her church (The one she attended as a teen. Now she lives half way across the country). Through today's conversation we discovered locating us started with a google and then a flurry of phone calls, first to a funeral home where my name had appeared in an obituary as the minister of record in a memorial service, and then to several churches in central Texas where she recalled Carolon and I had previously worked.

A few weeks ago she made plans to come to the area to visit a friend and we made plans to meet for a meal. "On the Border" became the host for a special reunion. She had the same smile, same bubbly spirit, and same sincere attitude. Twenty years had passed, she now had a family, our kids are grown, and yet there was something warmly familiar about the moment. She introduced us to the friend she was visiting, a vibrant spirited young Christian woman; and by the end of the lunch we were all hugging goodbye, anxious for the next connect.

It must have taken 30-40 minutes to order and four, or five return trips by the waiter saying, "Are you ready to order yet? Take your time, there is no rush." Finally, we paused long enough to dispense with the choosing so we could reignite the conversation. One of the most beautiful moments for Carolon and I came as we listened to her tell her faith journey. Listening to her tell about her faith, her Christian family, her bible study, love of worship, and church sent us away grateful beyond description at a God of grace.

Ministry leaves us with so many moments, and situations where we wonder. It feels good to know! And suddenly past memories open the door to future ones.

Laugh and Enjoy

Some of us remain so stressed out. We are like rubber bands constantly extended and waiting to break. And the people around us stand with guards up anticipating at any time we will lift the mixer blades of our life out of the bowl, while it is still running, and well, you know what happens. The people around us are treated to more of us than they want. So, what brought this on? Glad you asked! I frequently work through lunch and today while deep in thought the fire alarm suddenly broke into action – the sound reminded me of a church business meeting I attended as a young man where the atmosphere was filled with a lot of noise and chaos (little common sense, incidentally). So, what happened? One of the preschool kids touched what should only be touched in an emergency. At least the preschooler was in preschool. When I satisfied my curiosity I was a boy in grade school. When the sign says, "Alarm will sound if opened," IT REALLY WILL!

OK, so we know life can be unpredictable; even with the most innocent intentions things happen; and yet we move with the grace of a volcano people will notice if ignited, yes self included. But, we can also "take things in stride" as the saying goes. Today was a good day for me, it was stride day. And the people around me did not leave with more of me than they wanted!

Sharing the Experience

This morning I dropped Carolon off at Love Field for the flight to Houston Hobby and tomorrow she will board a cruise ship out of Galveston for her inaugural cruise. I sit at home still awaiting my induction into what seems like a uniform opinion from those who’ve been, “there is nothing quite like a cruise, the food is wonderful, and everything you need is taken care of.” Ok I get the point, but still I sit at home!

This summer Carolon has spent several days out of town helping to care for a new grandbaby addition to the family and so in prep for this trip she asked me,” so what are you going to do while I am gone?” I responded, “Well, last time I read five books and was able to catch up on a lot of work.” Yes, honesty is the best policy, but not without consequences. Again I sit at home, awaiting what may prove to be an allusive dream of one day sailing the high seas.

In anticipation of applying for a doctoral program at summers end, I have work needing to be done over the next week. It is the perfect time to shift to a higher gear. The itch is returning to write, and I’m feeling something a little demanding, perhaps a little more scholarly for a journal offering, may command my vision. VBS is just a week away and I am torn between an adult textual study which is my passion, or a video series on family which has been quite popular. Regardless I have to decide the direction and do the prep. And yet the waves and the breeze, the sound of laughter and the aroma of exquisite dishes keep high jacking higher and more worthy thoughts. I sit at home, wanting, waiting, wondering…

Last night Carolon and I sat down for a wonderful steak dinner to celebrate (though a day late) 31 years of marriage. And what I have discovered, more in recent months than ever before, we have reached a point in life, in marriage, where I have this unexplainable sort of satisfaction along with her in what she experiences. When she went to help with the new grandbaby I felt a sense of being there and enjoying it also. And in anticipation for this trip I didn’t feel regret for not going, just excited she was going with three close friends to have, as we say, “the time of her life.”

Yes I sit at home wanting to one day board a ship myself and be overwhelmed by the vastness of the ocean all around, but tomorrow I feel the joy for and through Carolon.

Graduation

Cap and Gown season is here and we find ourselves celebrating with at least 11 families, seven at our home church and several others from families we have been friends with for years. In my youth ministry days I would yearly attend three, or four ceremonies of 700 to 800 graduates. The convention center hosting the graduation would be packed, the pomp and circumstance well choreographed, and the atmosphere electric. Every family waiting for the 5 to 10 seconds of fame for "their graduate!"

Honestly whether the graduation is in southeast Texas, central Texas, or North Texas some aspects are predictable. I suppose over the years I have attended so many graduations the predictable has become the norm. But, tonight the unanticipated burst in to deliver a freshness.

Carolon and I traveled to the small school district of Kopperl to celebrate the graduation of our friend Reagan. Both an accomplished athlete, achieving a full athletic scholarship with Harding University, and Salutatorian of her class; Reagan delivered a remarkable speech, sensitive to her class and expressing the necessary inherent gratitude for all who experience great achievements in life. Others spoke, awards were given out and then it happened -- the unexpected, at least by us. In front of the stage the typical flower arrangements adorned the front, but they were not there to dress the stage. At the given moment each of the grads walked to the front and began taking long stemmed flowers out of their designated vases and delivering them to friends and family throughout the audience they wanted to "thank." Beautiful Celtic music played as 16 grads went back and forth from their vases to the audience. It was touching! Now we might say this is the sort of activity one can pull off in a small school, and perhaps that is true. We also might say many schools have their own brand of this type of sentimental expression of gratitude and perhaps that is also true. But, I have been to alot of high school graduations and I have never been touched in quite the way I was tonight.

Graduations are about the individual achieving a goal, but they are also about all the people who have prayed and supported that individual toward that goal. Is it really one person dancing across a stage, or a host of hearts dancing the "happy dance" across the stage? Long ago I came to realize the weddings I performed should appropriately acknowledge the many people who have poured their love into the two hearts making a covenant. And in premarrital counseling, when I share this with a couple, they are appreciative that what they have felt will be noted; but tonight I saw a school do it right with graduation.

We attended another graduation ceremony tonight like the many which preceded. Except it wasn't. I stand to applause Kopperl High School who has discovered the true meaning of graduation!

The Season

Carolon and I have persistently viewed each time of our lives - marriage, raising children, ministry transition - as a great season of life. Such perspective can bring accurate accusations of being unrealistic about life. The tensions inherent in each season for the sane evokes feelings of frustration, disappointment, unsurety, etc., which is true. And we have experienced the gamut of emotions, but our choice has always been to land on the upside, the sun rising, the romantic sunset, the awards assemblies, tax day behind us, kids tax testing at school in the rearview mirror, vacation just around the corner, the transmission repaired, and I could go on of course.

At this time of life friends I care about deeply are experienced uncertain times, broken hearts, and questioning their next step. I feel their anguish and the distance separating us makes the agony more acute. But, breaking through this cloudy day a light of brilliance has emerged through the freshness of new life as our little Ali May came into the world last Friday with her initial words predicting the promising future awaiting her. As she looked around the room at all the strange faces she paused at one offering an innocent smile. Her words? I Love You Grandad! I see a trip to McDonalds in her future.

Journey

Church has been my life in many respects. Always there, never traipsing off on a tangent, faithfully present and involved. When in those situations where people told their Jonah stories of running from God, I had little to say but “Didn’t run away,” “I stayed home.” When the “stay home” brother of the prodigal story fame occasionally made an appearance; through some preacher’s sermon, or book I was reading; I knew how the guy felt. He stayed home and so did I. Didn’t waste my father’s wealth! Worked hard! Completely dependable!

The “stayed home” story feels lacking at those moments of personal testimony, but should I really feel guilty about doing the right thing? Ridiculous, isn’t. Even now these meanderings seem an exercise of the foolish. But, somewhere along the way I began to peel away the self-confidence of staying home, the temptation to pride of remaining inside on rainy days instead of trudging through the mud. I began to see running in place can be as detrimental as running the wrong way, and actually is it not just another way of running the wrong way?

Life at home, or painfully sorting through the mess called “my life,” most appropriately operates under the banner of Journey. Not there yet! Have much to learn! Pray for me! Viewed as a journey the life of faith (seeking faith, or greater faith) is actually quite liberating. It releases me to ask and seek, to celebrate when finding, and lean dependently when at a loss.

There is no pride left in not running away, I’ve come to discover we all have our Jonah moments; some of us are just a little better at concealing them.